Psychotherapy or do I need a Dr.Shrink to treat me of this condition?I’m in the midst of hitting rock bottom,
I need help and I sometimes feel, I’m better off as dead.
I belong to a family with mild mental illness background. I am still single, and much of that because I belong to a very religious group that don’t allow us to marry anyone that have a different faith nor even associate with them. For quite some time now, I’ve been living a double life. I am shy in front of my family and others but I have a wild side of me, that lead me to get addicted on the internet for flirting and cyber sex with different men on the net. It also escalated to the point of meeting men for casual encounters, through sex phone lines. No one knows about this as I keep it. I stopped for awhile and got back to my ordinary life and now, I am feeling again the urge to do it. I feel so down and depress, I feel envy seeing my friends married with kids and here I am, getting old taking care of my mom and siblings who cannot stand on their own. I need help, any advice would be very much appreciated.
Thank you.
Posted in children psychotherapy
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April 29th, 2009 at 2:09 pm
If you're really thinking about suicide you should definitely see a counselor of some kind. It sounds like you're living a life that you don't want. Maybe you need to move out on your own and find what it is that will make you happy - perhaps a religion that is less strict or no religion at all. And dating people you like no matter their faith without having to hide it. I know you say your Mom and sibling can't take care of themselves but maybe they just don't because they know that you will handle it. If you stop doing everything for them, they'll have to learn to do something for themselves. If you find what it is that will make you happy in life, then live it without guilt and you won't feel the need to have secret meetings with men or participate in cybersex. If your family doesn't accept this, then you have to decide what is more important. You can live for yourself and be a happy, productive person or you can live for your family and their religion and be miserable and desperate. I know it's hard to go against your family and upbringing. Maybe you should move away (like to another state) for a while and just learn to live free of their expectations and judgements. I hope that you can find what you need to live a long and happy life.
April 29th, 2009 at 2:09 pm
I'm not a professional, but as somebody who has struggled with anxiety issues I would suggest psychotherapy. If you don't feel like that helps you after a little while, you can see a psychiatrist and get medication.
I wouldn't suggest seeing a psychiatrist first. I think we medicate far too many people in the U.S. for psychological problems that don't require medication.
April 29th, 2009 at 2:09 pm
Pray. What religious group won't allow you to associate with others? I've never heard of that before. No offense I just find it strange is all. Email or IM me if you want. I'll pray for you too.
April 29th, 2009 at 2:09 pm
I think counseling would be an excellent idea. You need to figure out why you are doing things counter to your faith (is is really your faith-do you belive it- or just what was imposed on you? what would happen if you changed faiths?)
* feeling like you were better off dead is a sure sign of depression- meds can help, but you need to talk to someone to sort this out.
Regardless of the religion aspect, the behaviors you are exhibiting are unhealthy & might be due to low self esteem or a need for approval or thrill seeking of some kind. There are better ways to get all those needs met outside of sex with random people (and that's not healthy either- you dont want an STD & you don't want to meet an axe murderer.)
please find a counselor (outside of your church) & best of luck
April 29th, 2009 at 2:09 pm
You are screwed. But you could be helped. You are oppressed. You can have what ever you want. You are rebelling with the casual encounters and internet sex. It is not good. You need to get free of the religious opression. You only live once. If you do not you will miss out on life. You must break out. Or you will remain dead. And you are dead. You will get no other chance. Remember "Think for yourself…Question Authority". You must act and act now. I feel so sorry for you. You must live your life. Forget what youir family says. You feel envy because you want a family. You are being abused.